Sunday, August 7, 2016
fish,the other side of me
When the zephyrs pulse the sails I feel the tiller in my
fingers,
Feluccas dancing, flirting on the swollen Nile,
Slowly touch the distance the meniscus of horizons a
shimmering mirage
across the desert sands.
I follow silken threads in coral caves in soft suspension,
Blades of torches scything through the stagnant gloom,
Life's breath escapes like mercury, swarming to the ceiling
Silver serpents tunnel shadows to another room.
I sensed someone there, I turned around, it wasn't you,
I couldn't recognise at first just who it was, it had been a
while,
It seems crazy after all that has been said and done,
I took a vow that we would never walk alone,
But here I am, eye to eye and face to face with the other
side of me.
Where the doorways tempt my intrigue with another key of
sunlight,
I am not afraid,
I nurse a steady heartbeat; the currency of breathing pays
my way
toward new openings, In a life I used to know before.
First person singular, me, myself, I
First person singular, no tears left to cry,
I'm smiling deep inside, first person singular.
I wander through the archways of green and lush cathedrals,
barefoot on soft needles on the forest floor,
Awake inside a daydream, sombre meditation,
I only hear the whisper of the falling leaves.
It seems crazy after all that has been said and done,
I took a vow that we would never walk alone,
So here I am, eye to eye and face to face with the other
side of me.
I lay on table mountain gazing down on endless ocean,
and I knew deep in my soul that I was not alone,
Heightened by the freedom of this new realisation,
the sun rose to the heavens through this crack of dawn. this
crack of dawn.
I sensed someone there, I turned around, it wasn't you,
I couldn't recognise at first just who it was, it had been a
while,
It seems crazy after all that has been said and done,
I took a vow that we would never walk alone,
So here I am, eye to eye and face to face with the other
side of me.
The other side of me,
The other side of me,
On the other side of you
Fish ,Perfume River
one mood, one perspective...born out of experience and confusion,
as it happens..depression ...
There were no sirens, I heard no alarms,
This situation has somehow got completely out of hand.
It's no illusion; it's not a dream,
My eyes are open and all is as appears,
It's a perfect nightmare; it's a perfect nightmare,
In an imperfect world
I missed the wake up, slept through the dawn,
The world's a stage but I've declared these curtains drawn
Behind the fourth wall, behind the scenes
A discarded fading flower on the soporific, sensual perfume river
The perfect nightmare; escape the perfect nightmare, dream the perfect world,
I close my mind in soft surrender, in quiet resignation take the lies, I lock the door, I lock the door
I junk the mail, I never open letters, programme numbers that I know I'll never call
Collect addresses of friends who'll soon be strangers,
Message pending, I know just what it says, should I accept another lie? I swallow all the lies
I live the lie.
There are places that I know that I will never see, some I wish I'd never seen before
The horror stalks my vision and the cries ring in my ears, I am helpless, I am not brave, I am alone.
I wander the dark alleys of the citadel, deserted shops and empty houses mark my way,
Bullet holes in stuccoed walls are testimony to the voices disappeared within the fear
Take me away to the Perfume River; carry me down to the perfume river
Set me adrift on a well-stocked open boat
Show me the way down to the Perfume River, send me away down the perfume river
Pour that sweet, sweet liquor down my throat
Fire breathing dragons swarm in sweltering skies, spewing flame on innocents below
Charred and brittle corpses, blackened evidence, I am enraged, I am afraid, I am forlorn
The ashes from wise pages fly from libraries, tumble in the clouds of smoke and flies
To lie as dust in corners of dark palaces, the fetid smell of revolution haunts the air.
Take me away to the Perfume River; carry me down to the perfume river
Set me adrift on a well-stocked open boat
Show me the way to the Perfume River, send me away down the perfume river
Pour that sweet, sweet liquor down my throat; pour it down my throat
Carry me down to the Perfume River; hold me down in the Perfume River
Where I'll drown my sorrows, and I'll die in hope
Push me away down the Perfume River to the swirls and eddies of the Perfume River
In these dark and muddied waters just let me float
The truth I don't want to know
Albert Camus, quotes, what counts is to be true
"Life is short, and it is sinful to waste one’s time. They say I’m active. But being active is still wasting one’s time, if in doing one loses oneself. Today is a resting time, and my heart goes off in search of itself. If an anguish still clutches me, it’s when I feel this impalpable moment slip through my fingers like quicksilver… At the moment, my whole kingdom is of this world. This sun and these shadows, this warmth and this cold rising from the depths of the air: why wonder if something is dying or if men suffer, since everything is written on this window where the sun sheds its plenty as a greeting to my pity? I can say and in a moment I shall say that what counts is to be human and simple. No, what counts is to be true, and then everything fits in, humanity and simplicity. When am I truer than when I am the world? My cup brims over before I have time to desire. Eternity is there and I was hoping for it. What I wish for now is no longer happiness but simply awareness.
[…]
The great courage is still to gaze as squarely at the light as at death. Besides, how can I define the link that leads from this all-consuming love of life to this secret despair? If I listen to the voice of irony, crouching underneath things, slowly it reveals itself. Winking its small, clear eye, it says: “Live as if …” In spite of much searching, this is all I know."
"Those who prefer their principles over their happiness,refuse to be happy outside the conditions they seem to have attached to their happiness."
re-incarnation, immortality, Krishnamurti
"Krishnamurti Quote of the Day
Rio De Janeiro, Brazil | 2nd Public Talk 17th April, 1935
Question: Do you believe in reincarnation? Is it a fact? Can you give us proof from your personal experience?
Krishnamurti: The idea of reincarnation is as old as the hills; the idea that man, through many rebirths, going through innumerable experiences, will come at last to perfection, to truth, to God. Now what is it that is reborn, what is it that continues? To me, that thing which is supposed to continue is nothing but a series of layers of memory, of certain qualities, certain incompleted actions which have been conditioned, hindered by fear born of self-protection. Now that incomplete consciousness is what we call the ego, the "I". As I explained at the beginning in my brief introductory talk, individuality is the accumulation of the results of various actions which have been impeded, hindered by certain inherited and acquired values, limitations. I hope I am not making it very complicated and philosophical, I will try to make it simple.
When you talk of the "I", you mean by that a name, a form, certain ideas, certain prejudices, certain class distinctions, qualities, religious prejudices, and so on, which have been developed through the desire for self-protection, security, comfort. So, to me, the "I", based on an illusion, has no reality. Therefore the question is not whether there is reincarnation, whether there is a possibility of future growth, but whether the mind and heart can free themselves from this limitation of the "I", the "mine".
You ask me whether I believe in reincarnation or not because you hope that through my assurance you can postpone understanding and action in the present, and that you will eventually come to realize the ecstasy of life or immortality. You want to know whether, being forced to live in a conditioned environment with limited opportunities, you will through this misery and conflict ever come to realize that ecstasy of life, immortality. As it is getting late I have to put it briefly, and I hope you will think it over.
Now I say there is immortality, to me it is a personal experience; but it can be realized only when the mind is not looking to a future in which it shall live more perfectly, more completely, more richly. Immortality is the infinite present. To understand the present with its full, rich significance, mind must free itself from the habit of self-protective acquisition; when it is utterly naked, then only is there immortality."
Ojai, 3rd meeting 1980
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS 17TH QUESTION OJAI, CALIFORNIA 3RD QUESTION & ANSWER MEETING 13TH MAY 1980 'REINCARNATION'
"Question: Would you please make a definite statement about the non-existence of reincarnation since increasing `scientific evidence' is now being accumulated to prove reincarnation is a fact. I am concerned because I see large numbers of people beginning to use this evidence to further strengthen a belief they already have, which enables them to escape problems of living and dying. Is it not your responsibility to be clear, direct and unequivocable on this matter instead of hedging round the issue?
We will be very definite. The idea of reincarnation existed long before Christianity. It is prevalent almost throughout India and probably in the whole Asiatic world. Firstly: what is it that incarnates; not only incarnates now, but reincarnates again and again? Secondly: the idea of there being scientific evidence that reincarnation is true, is causing people to escape their problems and that causes the questioner concern. Is he really concerned that people are escaping? They escape through football or going to church. Put aside all this concern about what other people do. We are concerned with the fact, with the truth of reincarnation; and you want a definite answer from the speaker.
What is it that incarnates, is reborn? What is it that is living at this moment, sitting here? What is it that is taking place now to that which is in incarnation?
And when one goes from here, what is it that is actually taking place in our daily life, which is the living movement of incarnation - one's struggles, one`s appetites, greeds, envies, attachments - all that? Is it that which is going to reincarnate in the next life?
Now those who believe in reincarnation, believe they will be reborn with all that they have now - modified perhaps - and so carry on, life after life. Belief is never alive. But suppose that belief is tremendously alive, then what you are now matters much more than what you will be in a future life.
in the Asiatic world there is the word `karma' which means action in life now, in this period, with all its misery, confusion, anger, jealousy, hatred, violence, which may be modified, but will go on to the next life. So there is evidence of remembrance of things past, of a past life. That remembrance is the accumulated `me', the ego, the personality. That bundle, modified, chastened, polished a little bit, goes on to the next life.
So it is not a question of whether there is reincarnation (I am very definite on this matter, please) but that there is incarnation now; what is far more important than reincarnation, is the ending of this mess, this conflict, now. Then something totally different goes on.
Being unhappy, miserable, sorrow-ridden, one says: "I hope the next life will be better". That hope for the next life is the postponement of facing the fact now. The speaker has talked a great deal to those who believe in and have lectured and written about reincarnation, endlessly. It is part of their game. I say,"All right, Sirs, you believe in it all. If you believe, what you do now matters". But they are not interested in what they do now, they are interested in the future. They do not say: "I believe and I will alter my life so completely that there is no future". Do not at the end of this say that I am evading this particular question; it is you who are evading it.I have said that the present life is all-important; if you have understood and gone into it, with all the turmoil of it, the complexity of it - end it, do not carry on with it. Then you enter into a totally different world. I think that is clear, is it not? I am not hedging. You may ask me: "Do you believe in reincarnation?" Right? I do not believe in anything. This is not an evasion I have no belief and it does not mean that I am an atheist, or that I am ungodly. Go into it, see what it means. It means that the mind is free from all the entanglements of belief.
In the literature of ancient India there is a story about death and incarnation. For a Brahmin it is one of the ancient customs and laws, that after collecting worldly wealth he must at the end of five years give up everything and begin again. A certain Brahmin had a son and the son says to him, "You are giving all this away to various people, to whom are you going to give me away; to whom are you sending me?" The father said, "Go away, I am not interested". But the boy comes back several times and the father gets angry and says, "I am going to send you to Death" - and being a Brahmin he must keep his word. So he sends him to Death. On his way to Death the boy goes to various teachers and finds that some say there is reincarnation, others say there is not. He goes on searching and eventually he comes to the house of Death. When he arrives, Death is absent. (A marvellous implication, if you go into it.) Death is absent. The boy waits for three days. On the fourth day, Death appears and apologizes. He apologizes because the boy was a Brahmin; he says, "I am sorry to have kept you waiting and in my regret I will offer you three wishes. You can be the greatest king, have the greatest wealth, or you can be immortal". The boy says, "I have been to many teachers and they all say different things. What do you say about death and what happens afterwards?" Death says: "I wish I had pupils like you; not concerned about anything except that". So he begins to tell him about truth, about the state of life in which there is no time"
Questions and Answers
Ojai, 3rd meeting 1980
QUESTIONS AND ANSWERS 17TH QUESTION OJAI, CALIFORNIA 3RD QUESTION & ANSWER MEETING 13TH MAY 1980 'REINCARNATION'
Texts and talks of Jiddu Krishnamurti. Krishnamurti quotes. Books about
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