another black day.

all what i do here is irrelevant. it is creating a world around me into which i can retire and where i can recreate.i could just as well go for a walk and talk to the neighbours or to the lady taking my money in the supermarket. what happens happens, and i cannot deny my awareness. today wish i could re-create but i can only be here and listen and wonder .a bad day for all of us. troops marching here and a civilian plane brought down there. all of this and more: so much wasted life. such an insult to reason. such a torture for the heart. where is this "love" we are all talking about? what is stronger, the fire of destruction or the passion of birth and creation, the clouds of hate and greed or the sword of reason? what is stronger, in the long run, the pen or the guns? i spent an evening with friends. but in spite of tiredness, i am sad now. are we humans human, is all this what we call human? then....i really don't know just now. if 'they' are stupid, then 'i' am. and somehow: i don't want to be like this. but i know: my thoughts and words are nothing, just thoughts and words