what is a double bind situation...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Double_bind

"A double bind is an emotionally distressing dilemma in communication in which an individual (or group) receives two or more conflicting messages, and one message negates the other. This creates a situation in which a successful response to one message results in a failed response to the other (and vice versa), so that the person will automatically be wrong regardless of response. The double bind occurs when the person cannot confront the inherent dilemma, and therefore can neither resolve it nor opt out of the situation."


well, i know, this is for sure..
it is not ALL enlightening...

this wiki link is not too bad.
really not.

Apart from Bateson,  R.D. Laing is one of those who did a lot of questioning on this subject, so did Cooper.
But ,alas, it is daily bread for all of us to chew on and my best way to confront it so far has always been to run away.

another way may be to just fcn ignore it.

as soon as desire is involved, it will be always difficult to ignore.
most persons will fall back in childhood patterns of behaviour,
and it is hard to find a way out.

further communication in any double-bind situation will most times only result
in  staying even deeper in a net which can but cloud the perception of truth and
will prevent all free flow in life.

it will disturb love and kill all.

seeing through it though one can just get tired of it,
choose and go away, bearing the loss but free.

it happens all the time, doesn't it?

and it is not a question of who is guilty but of how to stop it.
how to communicate....
or to stop "communicating".