In my language there is the German word "Sehnsucht".
It is not directly translatable. It is similar but not the same as saudade(Portuguese).
At the roots of the word it is clear that it contains tension and suffering , it is the expression
of missing really one self or/and another loved one but it is also "Sehnen der Finsternis nach dem Licht und der Kraft Gottes" (Jacob Böhme), it will stay with us for life and sometimes we are more aware of it as other times possibly depending on our own growth of soul, our experience of space,
our way to joy.
I always try to translate according to what i wish to express.
There is no Sehnsucht for a glass of water not even in the desert, this is thirst, it is not comparable to "lust", not to wanting- it is filled with a person's whole being, soul, emotions, body, past, memory, dreams and essence.
I would call it a creative driving force - which without intelligence and spirit
can turn into obsession or depression.
Once i translate into desire, a word which probably roots in waiting for the stars,
i mean with desire the deep craving for fusion, i must be honest if not true and true if not honest, fusion with a loved person, with trees, rivers, wind and fire and fields and stones,
or the experience of being one, for paradise lost, for life,for death:
it is quite clear that this desire can never be filled
though it can be filled all the time for NOW, only for now.
so i translate desire into a primordial wish for transformation,transcendence, salvation,
it has a more or less spiritual accent.
I translate into longing when i want to express missing to be at home with my self, with a loved person,for warmth, for care, for a time of happiness and peace and joy, for intimacy in an atmosphere of trust and welcome, it can even be more simple and mean to miss a good friend. In the end it is also missing to be one with the stars and God, but it has in my usage of the word the elements of more precise wishing and missing and stretching out of soul and skin.
so i translate longing into something more as a wish for a physical home, for warmth, care and affection, for simple love.
In my context i do not desire a woman , i do not desire cherries and i do not long to go
to cinema . these i would put under wishes and wanting
and lust and hunger and thirst. i see these more external, peripheral-until i get too hungry maybe...
Sehnsucht, desire and longing i see as coming out of the soul, and at the same time as we are all physical beings i can 'feel' , they stretch out ( to be long, longing) into space, towards another soul
and body, or inside and in the skin or through the skin, they search for space: i do. I do physically too.
It is not the words which are a problem. It is the context. The estrangement from true Sehnsucht,
desire and longing as all these have been made into marketable objects and they have been given
social values and then symbols we are told to buy such as cars, valentine, halloween, christmas, easter, birthday. Though it is not bad to have feasts to come together, it cannot be good to
pay attention to our selves and to each other in this way: it is mutilation.
It would be much better to go along with our deep frustration and pain and sadness
and appreciate it. When we cannot do this we cannot find true joy.
This is what i have been convinced of all my life.
Now i am coming to another context- it goes towards meditation.
to be free of all desire..for all life....i object on the grounds of what i said above.
but i do not object meditation: it is the only way of transformation
and at times transcendence we can find apart from through a hell of suffering,
maybe a sudden wholesome shock coming to cancer patients- often when they know
there is not much time to live they can appreciate life and presence and now.
in meditation Sehnsucht, desire, longing are there and pass ,
all thoughts and emotions and words and memories pass, we leave the noise
and then sometimes we can be still.
when we do it often and regularly enough we can find our inner space,
with time we learn to keep it, and walk out with it and
we will see what remains of value and meaning for us and in others more readily.
meditation is not giving up, it is transformation, and so is love.
love is a more difficult word-when two humans love each other it can be simple to say
and good. when they talk about it: discussion kills original meaning for both, and it stops flow.
"Love" is too heavily loaded.,
Kindness is a simple word: kindness is the most valuable quality
and the most difficult to keep in the run of life.
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