Caitlin Moran, How to build a girl, quotes

"When cynicism becomes the default language, playfulness and invention become impossible. Cynicism scours through a culture like bleach, wiping out millions of small, seedling ideas. Cynicism means your automatic answer becomes “No.” Cynicism means you presume everything will end in disappointment.

And this is, ultimately, why anyone becomes cynical. Because they are scared of disappointment. Because they are scared someone will take advantage of them. Because they are fearful their innocence will be used against them ......"

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"Cynicism is, ultimately, fear. Cynicism makes contact with your skin, and a thick black carapace begins to grow — like insect armor. This armor will protect your heart, from disappointment — but it leaves you almost unable to walk. You cannot dance in this armor. Cynicism keeps you pinned to the spot, in the same posture, forever." 

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Here she writes on the cynicism of the young..

but i take it to heart and wish more would..

i remember the struggle of mind and spirit it took me not to turn a cynic

at around the age of 17/18.

i thought i had managed mostly to stay open, 

neither getting lost in a wall of ideology nor overwhelmed by promises of religions

and New Age nor stuck in cynicism:

but i can see i changed

and re-changed and changed again: 

it is for a thinking existence  very difficult not to fall for cynicism,

at my age mixing often with bitterness growing and crystallizing.

So.

I take it to heart-

end of quotes:

'When you keep saying “No,” all that’s left is what other people said “Yes” to before you were born. Really, “No” is no choice at all." '

This is for the young- but valid for us too, the old, going together with

perceiving in memory all we do not wish to say 'no' to and with a shifting our focus

inside. 

Even for us this 'fear' must be recognized more easily and maybe we can do this 

with a bit more more detachment:

we are much nearer to death. 

And there is no wall to protect us, 

we will die.

All to do is to try to improve and care on what we see each one as

'quality' of and in our being and living.

Caitlin Moran, How to build a girl