to be or to fly

i bite the night
with my teeth,
i cut you  as
into my own blood

with nails and words,
invoking the silence
of the dead, wounding
us, killer, damned,

i took death, chose
the knife, inflicted pain,
my cruel heart
turning yours sour,

like milk curdling
with acid, increased
my own suffering,
blew up steam, poison,

until i wished to
kill all and me,
not bearing to look
at me, a vermin,

damned to stay
underground, in traps,
mouseholes, in the
dark crevices of me.

so i am no better.
we kill for ideas,
religion, dreams
and just to hurt.

where we find
no love nor home
we will destroy
and rape and loot

and houses, fields
will burn, hunger
and despair will win.
this is the waste land

creeping into me,
this night, all mine,
i made it, i will
bear the cross

to be or to fly,
to dream or to die.
i will not stay
with my wings

tied in a knot.
i eat silence,
i swallow noise,
i live in thin air.

i dig the walls,
i dig and dig,
i bite the night
with my teeth