Monday, February 29, 2016
but the nightingale ( essence of music )
but the nightingale,
i rarely heard its
sweetness through thickets
and deadwood
but it called me
and i cried with longing
even listening to sparrows
fighting i remember the song
and now
walking my frozen land,
even now
it will melt my heart
i rarely heard its
sweetness through thickets
and deadwood
but it called me
and i cried with longing
even listening to sparrows
fighting i remember the song
and now
walking my frozen land,
even now
it will melt my heart
T.S. Eliot, What the Thunder said, quote, first lines only
"After the torchlight red on sweaty faces
After the frosty silence in the gardens
After the agony in stony places
The shouting and the crying
Prison and palace and reverberation
Of thunder of spring over distant mountains
He who was living is now dead
We who were living are now dying
With a little patience"
After the frosty silence in the gardens
After the agony in stony places
The shouting and the crying
Prison and palace and reverberation
Of thunder of spring over distant mountains
He who was living is now dead
We who were living are now dying
With a little patience"
broken and walking easy
i am like a broken man
maybe cannot love anymore,
am tired of words
and soon of feeling
we are by now used
to tell each other:
you don't know how to love.
what is love when we talk?
i love the sky,
the scent of horses,
the evening call of crows,
trees and stones
It is easy,
i walk easy:
they do not want
to change me
They do not cross
my perception,
they are there,
so why desire
for them to stay
And the sound of life
flows in my memory
without pain,
without fear,
there is no cause for doubt
I understand
that we cannot be
like this, I cannot,
I am an obstacle
which you cannot bear.
I don't come easy,
and you are not so gentle,
only in your dreams
and when i just am,
here or there,
not when i am me
who is just a man
though born of stars as you,
of wind and deserts
and rain, i must walk
around being me
Even I find this hard
at times, so i cannot
burden you with me,
maybe i better stay in the woods
where I am free
and innocent,
maybe.
I do not know.
maybe cannot love anymore,
am tired of words
and soon of feeling
we are by now used
to tell each other:
you don't know how to love.
what is love when we talk?
i love the sky,
the scent of horses,
the evening call of crows,
trees and stones
It is easy,
i walk easy:
they do not want
to change me
They do not cross
my perception,
they are there,
so why desire
for them to stay
And the sound of life
flows in my memory
without pain,
without fear,
there is no cause for doubt
I understand
that we cannot be
like this, I cannot,
I am an obstacle
which you cannot bear.
I don't come easy,
and you are not so gentle,
only in your dreams
and when i just am,
here or there,
not when i am me
who is just a man
though born of stars as you,
of wind and deserts
and rain, i must walk
around being me
Even I find this hard
at times, so i cannot
burden you with me,
maybe i better stay in the woods
where I am free
and innocent,
maybe.
I do not know.
Sunday, February 28, 2016
morning coffee with three portions of sugar
sweet, my late coffee.
my cat has not turned up.
this night the moon
moved me in sleep.
the tides of me,
my gravity,
they reached my soul
and now the morning
no sun to see
which will feed me energy
but there is light
and i am conscious of it.
and i will rise
in this,
through the milky sky
and over the spots of white,
the cold snow
which still is there,
unwilling to melt
but already losing
in the face of spring.
and i will turn into a bud
risking to freeze
and very much alive,
so sensitive to the frost
i must grow and come out.
my cat has not turned up.
this night the moon
moved me in sleep.
the tides of me,
my gravity,
they reached my soul
and now the morning
no sun to see
which will feed me energy
but there is light
and i am conscious of it.
and i will rise
in this,
through the milky sky
and over the spots of white,
the cold snow
which still is there,
unwilling to melt
but already losing
in the face of spring.
and i will turn into a bud
risking to freeze
and very much alive,
so sensitive to the frost
i must grow and come out.
Trovante - "Despertar" do disco "Cais das Colinas" (LP 1983)
É um pássaro, é uma rosa,
é o mar que me acorda?
Pássaro ou rosa ou mar,
tudo é ardor, tudo é amor.
Acordar é ser rosa na rosa,
canto na ave, água no mar.
Poema: Eugénio de Andrade , in "Coração do Dia"
Philip Glass - Songs and Poems for Solo Cello - SONG III, & my tonight's associations
music stirring leaves up from the riverbed, dead and alive ones.
beauty, love, death, there is nothing to be generalized about these,
they are all very personal affairs. and they are inseparable from life as a soul.
beauty...is not there when i am not flowing with life,
when there is no hope but only mere courage to cross
the borders of sadness and estrangement.
then all beauty appears constructed, far away and foreign,
what shimmers alive in the morning light is by now
like dead matter,and, mind you, i don't believe in matter,
it may look like rotting flesh brought out to attract the birds of prey,
to wear down my energy, to weigh upon my soul
like a stone.
and now i am this stone, i can be touched, smooth,
rough, cold or warm, round or with cracks and fissures and edges and scars.
but i feel not more than a stone can feel.
and still i hurt inside. i hurt, separated from my volcanic origin
i am heavy but weak, lonely among rocks and snakes and rain
and in the merciless heat of the sun.
i live in a desert. and now i am this desert.
i am a deserted place,
deprived,
but still alive another way
under the ashes of memory.
and i spread the scent of thyme, of autumn fires
and of a human who lived here.
somebody said i could leave this place
and go for a swim.
only i just don't know why.
I'd need a true call, a push, a pull,
but who can move stones and deserts?
is it love or is it pain or will it be this 'you'
who just needs to ask me, not more, not less.
beauty, love, death, there is nothing to be generalized about these,
they are all very personal affairs. and they are inseparable from life as a soul.
all communication in which no tear flows are insubstantial.
i can listen to laughs and to tears, and i can feel the breath and
the essence of beauty, love, death.
when beauty becomes too important per se, barbarism begins with
selection, this is the decadence of aestheticism, a sometimes deadly intellectual game
as history shows.
and when self-observation is asked to bring joy to life,
the end is living in the past and a vague idea of freedom.
when there is no hope but only mere courage to cross
the borders of sadness and estrangement.
then all beauty appears constructed, far away and foreign,
what shimmers alive in the morning light is by now
like dead matter,and, mind you, i don't believe in matter,
it may look like rotting flesh brought out to attract the birds of prey,
to wear down my energy, to weigh upon my soul
like a stone.
and now i am this stone, i can be touched, smooth,
rough, cold or warm, round or with cracks and fissures and edges and scars.
but i feel not more than a stone can feel.
and still i hurt inside. i hurt, separated from my volcanic origin
i am heavy but weak, lonely among rocks and snakes and rain
and in the merciless heat of the sun.
i live in a desert. and now i am this desert.
i am a deserted place,
deprived,
but still alive another way
under the ashes of memory.
and i spread the scent of thyme, of autumn fires
and of a human who lived here.
somebody said i could leave this place
and go for a swim.
only i just don't know why.
I'd need a true call, a push, a pull,
but who can move stones and deserts?
is it love or is it pain or will it be this 'you'
who just needs to ask me, not more, not less.
Saturday, February 27, 2016
conceptual love does not exist for another one
all i need
all i want
is tenderness
the sweetness in you
i love to touch
flowers and trees.
but i wanted you
to touch me
with your love
your heart
flowing through
hands and skin
into mine
and my heart
flowing into yours,
the secret life of flowers
who can bend their head
to the sun
and in the wind
but not touch each other.
it is not in their nature,
they are tickled by bees
but we are humans
and we can do it,
i don't need God and Death
nor angels
to caress me ,
my salvation will come.
I need your embrace
your smile, your laugh
your tears , your voice
through all these clouds
of fear and pain
But I cannot even dance
with you, knowing
you will leave me alone
when we come home,
i dread the end of days
until in my confusion
i refuse the light of the day
drawing the curtains
closing my ears
in violent withdrawal
But i cannot
close
this heart of mine.
all i want
is tenderness
the sweetness in you
i love to touch
flowers and trees.
but i wanted you
to touch me
with your love
your heart
flowing through
hands and skin
into mine
and my heart
flowing into yours,
the secret life of flowers
who can bend their head
to the sun
and in the wind
but not touch each other.
it is not in their nature,
they are tickled by bees
but we are humans
and we can do it,
i don't need God and Death
nor angels
to caress me ,
my salvation will come.
I need your embrace
your smile, your laugh
your tears , your voice
through all these clouds
of fear and pain
But I cannot even dance
with you, knowing
you will leave me alone
when we come home,
i dread the end of days
until in my confusion
i refuse the light of the day
drawing the curtains
closing my ears
in violent withdrawal
But i cannot
close
this heart of mine.
Paolo Fresu - No Potho Reposare
this title is so...not any language, certainly not Italian,...... youtube....
Friday, February 26, 2016
children are not always lost
a child to stretch out
note:
and i can carry .
but we are children in adults,
innocence is a feeling
and readiness to reach out
and it is so easily lost
in confrontation.
hands and burn fingers,
now growing old
to reach out
with soul and hands
not forgetting
but transforming past
and to be child again
we are so afraid
and we are so strong
listen to the taste of cherries
and the spring with this song,
though winter will come
all flowers will blossom
and love can carry
my heart and my life
note:
and i can carry .
but we are children in adults,
innocence is a feeling
and readiness to reach out
and it is so easily lost
in confrontation.
Thursday, February 25, 2016
George Harrison - "It Don't Come Easy"
re-flected more on my note below-.
what would happen when i prepare a nice meal thinking all the time
i could cut myself with a knife,
what would happen when i dance pre-visioning i could stumble,
what would happen when i walk a tightrope and i see myself falling all
the time,
what will happen when i listen to beautiful music pre-feeling its end,
what will happen when i love always fearing to be hurt?
for sure one thing:
i will not enjoy doing any of these things.
and i will not love.
the secret may be not to look for evasion of pain all the time.....
but i don't know, i am but a man
what would happen when i prepare a nice meal thinking all the time
i could cut myself with a knife,
what would happen when i dance pre-visioning i could stumble,
what would happen when i walk a tightrope and i see myself falling all
the time,
what will happen when i listen to beautiful music pre-feeling its end,
what will happen when i love always fearing to be hurt?
for sure one thing:
i will not enjoy doing any of these things.
and i will not love.
the secret may be not to look for evasion of pain all the time.....
but i don't know, i am but a man
Laurie Anderson & Lou Reed - Lost Art of Conversation live
holy....dipshit....well, sometimes true but not basic truth to stick to like to glue
Wednesday, February 24, 2016
Radiohead - Weird Fishes/Arpeggi (Scotch Mist Version)
don't want to escape so much but looking for...
what i found. must have misplaced it.
where are my specs?
what i found. must have misplaced it.
where are my specs?
In the deepest ocean
The bottom of the sea
Your eyes
They turn me
The bottom of the sea
Your eyes
They turn me
Why should I stay here?
Why should I stay?
Why should I stay?
I'd be crazy not to follow
Follow where you lead
Your eyes
They turn me
Follow where you lead
Your eyes
They turn me
Turn me into phantoms
I follow to the edge
Of the earth
And fall off
I follow to the edge
Of the earth
And fall off
Yeah, everybody leaves
If they get the chance
And this...
is my chance
If they get the chance
And this...
is my chance
I get eaten by the worms
And weird fishes
Picked over by the worms
And weird fishes
And weird fishes
Picked over by the worms
And weird fishes
Weird fishes
Weird fishes
Weird fishes
Yeah I, Ill hit the bottom
Hit the bottom and escape
Escape
Hit the bottom and escape
Escape
I, I hit the bottom
Hit the bottom and escape
Escape
Hit the bottom and escape
Escape
under the corrugated iron roof: memories of Uganda
Under the corrugated iron roof
with the drumming of the rain,
the grumbling of thunder,
the buzz of mosquitoes,
off and on the barking of dogs,
following sultry days
this scent of wet earth
came with soothing cool,
The deep sleeps came
like salvation, silence
inside and when the cock
crowed the morning was light
flowing and permeating
sky and faces and soul
with the hope we all need,
the clearness of newborn life
with the drumming of the rain,
the grumbling of thunder,
the buzz of mosquitoes,
off and on the barking of dogs,
following sultry days
this scent of wet earth
came with soothing cool,
The deep sleeps came
like salvation, silence
inside and when the cock
crowed the morning was light
flowing and permeating
sky and faces and soul
with the hope we all need,
the clearness of newborn life
Tus Manos, Pablo Neruda, for....someone i call you
Tus Manos, Pablo Neruda
Cuando tus manos salen,
amor, hacia las mías,
¿qué me traen volando?
¿por qué se detuvieron
en mi boca, de pronto,
por qué las reconozco
como si entonces, antes,
las hubiera tocado,
como si antes de ser
hubieran recorrido
mi frente, mi cintura?
amor, hacia las mías,
¿qué me traen volando?
¿por qué se detuvieron
en mi boca, de pronto,
por qué las reconozco
como si entonces, antes,
las hubiera tocado,
como si antes de ser
hubieran recorrido
mi frente, mi cintura?
Su suavidad venía
volando sobre el tiempo,
sobre el mar, sobre el humo,
sobre la primavera,
y cuando tú pusiste
tus manos en mi pecho,
reconocí estas alas de paloma dorada,
reconocí esa greda
y ese color de trigo.
volando sobre el tiempo,
sobre el mar, sobre el humo,
sobre la primavera,
y cuando tú pusiste
tus manos en mi pecho,
reconocí estas alas de paloma dorada,
reconocí esa greda
y ese color de trigo.
Los años de mi vida
yo caminé buscándolas,
subí las escaleras,
crucé los arrecifes,
me llevaron los trenes
las aguas me trajeron,
y en la piel de las uvas
me pareció tocarte.
La madera de pronto
me trajo tu contacto,
la almendra me anunciaba
tu suavidad secreta,
hasta que se cerraron
tus manos en mi pecho
y allí como dos olas
terminaron su viaje.
yo caminé buscándolas,
subí las escaleras,
crucé los arrecifes,
me llevaron los trenes
las aguas me trajeron,
y en la piel de las uvas
me pareció tocarte.
La madera de pronto
me trajo tu contacto,
la almendra me anunciaba
tu suavidad secreta,
hasta que se cerraron
tus manos en mi pecho
y allí como dos olas
terminaron su viaje.
Tuesday, February 23, 2016
why do i feel at home in hell?
i don't know if it is purgatory or just hell
but i start to feel at home here.
it doesn't make any sense to be there
but then nothing does, not obviously anyway.
i have found consolation in being blind
to hands stretched out in words and
to the idea of a God.
when i cannot find warmth and love
i will enjoy the fire and my solitude,
not at peace, but with all my edges,
with my unpolished raw self.
i do not wish to be a diamond
nor will i wear a tie on the day of my death.
i live naked, i love naked, and i will die naked
in purgatory, in hell or with a smile on my lips.
i risk my heart when i love
as i risk my life when i live.
i fail, i rise, i fall.
sometimes i stand up again,
surprisingly.
i cannot hear a voice.
i hear no voice.
God never called me anymore.
The angels fled me.
And the sweet apples
are rotting under the trees
with an intoxicating scent.
I must try and find a way
to laugh about myself,
how can i take myself
as being so important,
or as one Rabbi said:
O God, why is it my own problems
which disturb me most?
but i start to feel at home here.
it doesn't make any sense to be there
but then nothing does, not obviously anyway.
i have found consolation in being blind
to hands stretched out in words and
to the idea of a God.
when i cannot find warmth and love
i will enjoy the fire and my solitude,
not at peace, but with all my edges,
with my unpolished raw self.
i do not wish to be a diamond
nor will i wear a tie on the day of my death.
i live naked, i love naked, and i will die naked
in purgatory, in hell or with a smile on my lips.
i risk my heart when i love
as i risk my life when i live.
i fail, i rise, i fall.
sometimes i stand up again,
surprisingly.
i cannot hear a voice.
i hear no voice.
God never called me anymore.
The angels fled me.
And the sweet apples
are rotting under the trees
with an intoxicating scent.
I must try and find a way
to laugh about myself,
how can i take myself
as being so important,
or as one Rabbi said:
O God, why is it my own problems
which disturb me most?
Umberto Eco, quotes & a note
"What is love? There is nothing in the world, neither man nor Devil nor any thing, that I hold as suspect as love, for it penetrates the soul more than any other thing. Nothing exists that so fills and binds the heart as love does. Therefore, unless you have those weapons that subdue it, the soul plunges through love into an immense abyss."
"How does a person feel when looking at the sky? He thinks that he doesn’t have enough tongues to describe what he sees. Nevertheless, people have never stopping describing the sky, simply listing what they see... We have a limit, a very discouraging, humiliating limit: death. That’s why we like all the things that we assume have no limits and, therefore, no end. It’s a way of escaping thoughts about death. We like lists because we don’t want to die."
note:
i don't know about all this, i have to say it humbly, i rather feel like
a childish idiot wo cannot relate to himself anymore in a way which can
give joy to life and to somebody else. i am doubting everything,
maybe even the sky, not only love.
Doubting myself i doubt you.
Any you doubting me makes me doubt myself even more.
So human relationships can lead into a trap-
the child does not know
should it stay at home and be called a liar
or should it go to school and be called a liar,
the adult does not know
should he go to live or to die.
In the end he will go on living, most times,
but what if it feels like a lie?
Life will give me time to know.
"How does a person feel when looking at the sky? He thinks that he doesn’t have enough tongues to describe what he sees. Nevertheless, people have never stopping describing the sky, simply listing what they see... We have a limit, a very discouraging, humiliating limit: death. That’s why we like all the things that we assume have no limits and, therefore, no end. It’s a way of escaping thoughts about death. We like lists because we don’t want to die."
note:
i don't know about all this, i have to say it humbly, i rather feel like
a childish idiot wo cannot relate to himself anymore in a way which can
give joy to life and to somebody else. i am doubting everything,
maybe even the sky, not only love.
Doubting myself i doubt you.
Any you doubting me makes me doubt myself even more.
So human relationships can lead into a trap-
the child does not know
should it stay at home and be called a liar
or should it go to school and be called a liar,
the adult does not know
should he go to live or to die.
In the end he will go on living, most times,
but what if it feels like a lie?
Life will give me time to know.
Monday, February 22, 2016
a diary of sadness
i don't know anything.
i am astonished to say that
i feel somehow disappointed
that i didn't die.
all what happens now feels
like a cancer growing in me.
Sunday, February 21, 2016
Saturday, February 20, 2016
Friday, February 19, 2016
JOAN BAEZ ~ One Too Many Mornings ~
not my story.
there is snow outside this morning.
and now i am crying. what a stupid thing to do.my confusion is like a hurricane.
there is snow outside this morning.
and now i am crying. what a stupid thing to do.my confusion is like a hurricane.
500 miles - Peter, Paul and Mary [Original Audio]
i must be home where i feel at home,
no matter where
but with whom
or with myself
If you miss the train I'm on, you will know that I am gone You can hear the whistle blow a hundred miles, A hundred miles, a hundred miles, a hundred miles, a hundred miles, You can hear the whistle blow a hundred miles. Lord I'm one, Lord I'm two, Lord I'm three, Lord I'm four, Lord I'm 500 miles from my home. 500 miles, 500 miles, 500 miles, 500 miles Lord I'm five hundred miles from my home. Not a shirt on my back, not a penny to my name Lord I can't go a-home this a-way This a-away, this a-way, this a-way, this a-way, Lord I can't go a-home this a-way. If you miss the train I'm on you will know that I am gone You can hear the whistle blow a hundred miles.
no matter where
but with whom
or with myself
If you miss the train I'm on, you will know that I am gone You can hear the whistle blow a hundred miles, A hundred miles, a hundred miles, a hundred miles, a hundred miles, You can hear the whistle blow a hundred miles. Lord I'm one, Lord I'm two, Lord I'm three, Lord I'm four, Lord I'm 500 miles from my home. 500 miles, 500 miles, 500 miles, 500 miles Lord I'm five hundred miles from my home. Not a shirt on my back, not a penny to my name Lord I can't go a-home this a-way This a-away, this a-way, this a-way, this a-way, Lord I can't go a-home this a-way. If you miss the train I'm on you will know that I am gone You can hear the whistle blow a hundred miles.
Thursday, February 18, 2016
1500 miles
1500 miles
something like years
she said estrangement
but it had been there
all along
1500 miles
something like tears.
Blood in a vacuum cleaner
excuse me, it is a mess.
and not one bit nearer
1500 miles
i left the road
wandering in the desert
I saw the Rose of Jericho
flowering in the rain
but i stayed with the thistles
i eat them
as i am hungry
and i trot through stones
like a donkey
At times i thought:
do donkeys grin?
and now i ponder
when i will.
time will show.
Nobody can flow
forever floating,
either you flow
or you float.
I am not a boat.
I am a river
and i follow my bed
as i must
obliged to the will of the sky
and the weather.
note:
a continuing expectation that i must float
and just be there
somewhere next
and somewhere away
is not where i want to be.
i am floating enough.
two rivers flowing together
are much stronger.
but i will reach the sea
even if i should be weaker alone.
something like years
she said estrangement
but it had been there
all along
1500 miles
something like tears.
Blood in a vacuum cleaner
excuse me, it is a mess.
and not one bit nearer
1500 miles
i left the road
wandering in the desert
I saw the Rose of Jericho
flowering in the rain
but i stayed with the thistles
i eat them
as i am hungry
and i trot through stones
like a donkey
At times i thought:
do donkeys grin?
and now i ponder
when i will.
time will show.
Nobody can flow
forever floating,
either you flow
or you float.
I am not a boat.
I am a river
and i follow my bed
as i must
obliged to the will of the sky
and the weather.
note:
a continuing expectation that i must float
and just be there
somewhere next
and somewhere away
is not where i want to be.
i am floating enough.
two rivers flowing together
are much stronger.
but i will reach the sea
even if i should be weaker alone.
Yes - And You And I
A man conceived a moment's answers to the dream
Staying the flowers daily, sensing all the themes
As a foundation left to create the spiral aim
A movement regained and regarded both the same
Staying the flowers daily, sensing all the themes
As a foundation left to create the spiral aim
A movement regained and regarded both the same
All complete in the sight of seeds of life with you
Changed only for a sight the sound, the space agreed
Between the picture of time behind the face of need
Coming quickly to terms of all expression laid
Between the picture of time behind the face of need
Coming quickly to terms of all expression laid
Emotion revealed as the ocean maid
All complete in the sight of seeds of life with you
Oh, coins and crosses never know their fruitless worth
Cords are broken locked inside the mother earth
Cords are broken locked inside the mother earth
They won't hide, they won't tell you
Watching the world, watching all of the world
Watching us go by
And you and I climb over the sea to the valley
And you and I reached out for reasons to call
Coming quickly to terms of all expression laid
Emotion revealed as the ocean maid
As a movement regained and regarded both the same
Emotion revealed as the ocean maid
As a movement regained and regarded both the same
All complete in the side of seeds of life with you
Sad preacher nailed upon the colored door of time
Insane teacher be there reminded of the rhyme
There'll be no mutant enemy we shall certify
Insane teacher be there reminded of the rhyme
There'll be no mutant enemy we shall certify
Political ends, as sad remains, will die
Reach out as forward tastes begin to enter you
I listened hard but could not see
Life tempo change out and inside me
Life tempo change out and inside me
The preacher trained in all to lose his name
The teacher travels, asking to be shown the same
In the end, we'll agree, we'll accept, we'll immortalize
That the truth of the man maturing in his eyes
All complete in the sight of seeds of life with you
Coming quickly to terms of all expression laid
As a moment regained and regarded both the same
Emotion revealed as the ocean maid
As a moment regained and regarded both the same
Emotion revealed as the ocean maid
A clearer future, morning, evening, nights with you
And you and I climb, crossing the shapes of the morning
And you and I reach over the sun for the river
And you and I climb, clearer, towards the movement
And you and I reach over the sun for the river
And you and I climb, clearer, towards the movement
And you and I called over valleys of endless seas
black holes, cigarettes, wodka lemon
My cat goes
to hunt for mice,
catches them,
plays with them.
I don't know
if he kills them
or if they die
by accident.
I have been in love
and i cared
but now it feels
like a black hole.
Where we shared
fluid days
and presence
in roads and fields
Where we went
through joy and pain
meeting our essence:
Now i see nobody
not even me,
Black holes sucking energy,
unkwown to each other,
Terra Icognita
Which will remain white
on the map of life
and a torture burnt
into the memory of time.
The wind blows ashes
and senseless fights
across this universe,
Better to stay silent,
To see the birds coming
with song in this spring
and the dead bushes
greening with hope
And maybe to smoke,
have a wodka lemon,
to listen to death
coming nearer
Together with the streams
and small rivers gurgling
along with hypnotic sound.
All in all loneliness.
Life must be an accident,
my cat said so:
just the fun of hunting.
Does he lie?
to hunt for mice,
catches them,
plays with them.
I don't know
if he kills them
or if they die
by accident.
I have been in love
and i cared
but now it feels
like a black hole.
Where we shared
fluid days
and presence
in roads and fields
Where we went
through joy and pain
meeting our essence:
Now i see nobody
not even me,
Black holes sucking energy,
unkwown to each other,
Terra Icognita
Which will remain white
on the map of life
and a torture burnt
into the memory of time.
The wind blows ashes
and senseless fights
across this universe,
Better to stay silent,
To see the birds coming
with song in this spring
and the dead bushes
greening with hope
And maybe to smoke,
have a wodka lemon,
to listen to death
coming nearer
Together with the streams
and small rivers gurgling
along with hypnotic sound.
All in all loneliness.
Life must be an accident,
my cat said so:
just the fun of hunting.
Does he lie?
Boy Ge Mendes 'Lagoa' - Beijo de Longe Cape Verde
nothing to do with me but MY African past of 5 years in Uganda...
we had the music from Zaire and East Africa....
fear and death and life
i am not fearing death so much, but by now i am fearing me and life.
after a severe myocardial infarction my patients go to rehab and don't work for 6-8 weeks.
i start again on Monday.
it will take my mind off... myself.
a bit.
after a severe myocardial infarction my patients go to rehab and don't work for 6-8 weeks.
i start again on Monday.
it will take my mind off... myself.
a bit.
Wednesday, February 17, 2016
YES - SOON - Live in Amsterdam, 2001 (Legend Pt)
Soon oh soon the light
Pass within and soothe the endless night
And wait here for you
Our reason to be here
Soon oh soon the time
All we move to gain will reach and calm
Our heart is open
Our reason to be here
Long ago, set into rhyme
Soon oh soon the light
Ours to shape for all time, ours the right
The sun will lead us
Our reason to be here
Soon oh soon the light
Ours to shape for all time, ours the right
The sun will lead us
Our reason to be here
bad discipline
maybe it is a bad discipline
and my poems are as bad now
as i feel, but i need
some way of finding my way
and my unwanted truth:
so this is my discipline
in writing
and my poems are as bad now
as i feel, but i need
some way of finding my way
and my unwanted truth:
so this is my discipline
in writing
for my love i chased away
My love you stayed
underwater
in your soul
deep down
My love you lived
in dreams of fear,
hiding under
the sailing boats
You came with open heart
and a thirsty mind
but with indecision
blackening my time
My love you only
wanted to share
the dance in the light
and then withdraw
When the nightingale called
you left for your cage
where i could not
reach for you
And i had to walk
in mine which is
a place of cruel memory
and longing to be free
Near to death
i could not bear
your absence at night
and the coldness
Which you used
to fight my need
and your own,
being so frightened
And i refused the dance
and i cried
like a child in pain,
then i cut the music
And stood up
to hurt you.
Go away
I said
The first word
of growing up
is no
but not always right
I love you
for your fear
for your weakness
and helplessness
I love you
for your courage,
kindness, for
your fighting spirit
And this is
how i need to be loved
when i cry out
under the teeth of the harrow.
Wake up, wake up,
say yes or say no
and when you say yes
then come out from down under
and we can go and dance
and walk on the water
without fear to drown
or to hurt each other.
This is what i pray
and what i prayed for,
but praying is idle
when the sails are set
My love, sleep,sleep
and dream your flower
to unfold out of this
cocoon of suffering.
Your soul carries beauty,
let it come out,
i would touch it
with care and tenderness
But if not for me,
then for you,
it is your strength
and your beauty in life
and in dying.
Though i sent now
my heart into a submarine,
it can rise, rise
and meet yours
when the time will come.
underwater
in your soul
deep down
My love you lived
in dreams of fear,
hiding under
the sailing boats
You came with open heart
and a thirsty mind
but with indecision
blackening my time
My love you only
wanted to share
the dance in the light
and then withdraw
When the nightingale called
you left for your cage
where i could not
reach for you
And i had to walk
in mine which is
a place of cruel memory
and longing to be free
Near to death
i could not bear
your absence at night
and the coldness
Which you used
to fight my need
and your own,
being so frightened
And i refused the dance
and i cried
like a child in pain,
then i cut the music
And stood up
to hurt you.
Go away
I said
The first word
of growing up
is no
but not always right
I love you
for your fear
for your weakness
and helplessness
I love you
for your courage,
kindness, for
your fighting spirit
And this is
how i need to be loved
when i cry out
under the teeth of the harrow.
Wake up, wake up,
say yes or say no
and when you say yes
then come out from down under
and we can go and dance
and walk on the water
without fear to drown
or to hurt each other.
This is what i pray
and what i prayed for,
but praying is idle
when the sails are set
My love, sleep,sleep
and dream your flower
to unfold out of this
cocoon of suffering.
Your soul carries beauty,
let it come out,
i would touch it
with care and tenderness
But if not for me,
then for you,
it is your strength
and your beauty in life
and in dying.
Though i sent now
my heart into a submarine,
it can rise, rise
and meet yours
when the time will come.
Tuesday, February 16, 2016
Eric Clapton - Let It Grow
Let It Grow
Standing at the crossroads, trying to read the signs
To tell me which way I should go to find the answer,
And all the time I know,
Plant your love and let it grow.
Let it grow, let it grow,
Let it blossom, let it flow.
In the sun, the rain, the snow,
Love is lovely, let it grow.
Looking for a reason to check out of my mind,
Trying hard to get a friend that I can count on,
But there's nothing left to show,
Plant your love and let it grow.
Let it grow, let it grow,
Let it blossom, let it flow.
In the sun, the rain, the snow,
Love is lovely, let it grow.
Time is getting shorter and there's much for you to do.
Only ask and you will get what you are needing,
The rest is up to you.
Plant your love and let it grow.
Let it grow, let it grow,
Let it blossom, let it flow.
In the sun, the rain, the snow,
Love is lovely, let it grow.
not all rivers reach the sea: evaporation may help
My Lord in Heaven
whose name i do not know
I feel like a river
running dry
I spill myself
across dry flatlands
a desert
which i can never satisfy
My Lord in Heaven
whose name i don't know
you made me run
towards the sea
Where i should find
all my relatives,
where i could lose
myself and rest
In the movement
of all, in my true
being, water.
but now i am on fire
My Lord in Heaven
whose name i don't know
let me rise as a cloud
and rain into your sea
My Lord in Heaven
whose name i don't know
me being but a man,
no woman can cradle
My longing in her arms,
my heart is poor and rich,
dry out my tears,
take me to your sea.
whose name i do not know
I feel like a river
running dry
I spill myself
across dry flatlands
a desert
which i can never satisfy
My Lord in Heaven
whose name i don't know
you made me run
towards the sea
Where i should find
all my relatives,
where i could lose
myself and rest
In the movement
of all, in my true
being, water.
but now i am on fire
My Lord in Heaven
whose name i don't know
let me rise as a cloud
and rain into your sea
My Lord in Heaven
whose name i don't know
me being but a man,
no woman can cradle
My longing in her arms,
my heart is poor and rich,
dry out my tears,
take me to your sea.
Jim Morrison, Dance on Fire
"Well the music is your special friend
Dance on fire as it intends
Music is your only friend
Until the end."
Dance on fire as it intends
Music is your only friend
Until the end."
Lhasa De Sela - Where do you go
Where do you go
When your tides get low
In the summer dress
Of your drunkenness
I go far from here
Where the silence sleeps
In the very deeps
Of the holy blue
And I dream of you
And I dream of you
Dream of you
Dream of you
What do you say
When the rotted day
Is around your feet
In the noisy street
And your eyes fall rain
From pain from pain
I say never again
Never again
Never again
Why do you wander
So light though falling
In the underwater calling
I skate like a bird
Drunk on a word
Almost in love
If I only knew
But the best will drive
Through me and you
Me and you
Me and you
Neil Young - Will To Love
WILL TO LOVE
It has often been my dream
To live with one who wasn't there
Like an ocean fish who swam upstream
Through nets, by hooks, and hungry bears.
When the water grew less deep
My fins were aching from the strain
I'm swimming in my sleep
I know I can't go back again.
Got the will to love, the will to love.
I'll never lose it, never lose the will to love,
Never lose the will.
It's like something from up above.
I can be like a fire in the night
Always warm and giving off light
But there comes a time when I shine too bright
Oh, I'm just a fire in the night.
And now my fins are in the air
And my belly's scraping on the rocks
I still think someone really cares
And I'll keep swimming till I stop.
Got the will to love, the will to love.
I'll never lose it, never lose the will to love,
Never lose the will.
It's like something from up above.
I'm like a singer on the stage
With the golden lights and liquid rage
Down from the mountains to the sea
Cool running love keeps cleansing me.
It keeps my gills from getting dry
But it distorts things in my eyes
Sometimes I see what really isn't there
Like my true lover, and I care.
Got the will to love, the will to love.
I'll never lose it, never lose the will to love,
Never lose the will.
It's like something from up above.
Sometimes I ramble on and on
And I repeat myself till all my friends are gone
And get lost in snow and drown in rain
And never feel the same again.
I remember the ocean from where I came
Just one of millions all the same
But somewhere someone calls my name
I'm a harpoon dodger, and I can't, won't be tamed.
Got the will to love, the will to love.
I'll never lose it, never lose the will to love,
Never lose the will.
It's like something from up above.
Baby, if I see boredom in your eyes
I'll know my river has run dry
But I won't turn back with that lonely tide
I bought that ticket and I'll take that ride.
If we meet along the way
Please sway beside me, let us sway together
Our tails together and our fins and mind
We'll leave this water and let our scales shine
In the sun above and the sky below
So all the water and earth will know
It has often been my dream
To live with one who wasn't there.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)