"Many of us recognize that our emotions are out of control—or in control of us. We long for close, intimate relationships with others, but our feelings are often so overpowering that we can’t find the way to open up to others and relate to their experience.
Because we are so focused on how we feel, we may become self-protective and defensive, constantly worried that others will hurt or take advantage of us. These feelings of self-protection can be part of an ongoing emotional cycle, feeding even stronger emotional reactions that cause chaos in our minds and in our interpersonal relationships."
...
"We suffer because we continually choose to identify with and focus on how we feel. But identifying with our emotions is like throwing fuel on a fire. "
__________________________________________________________
emotions speak through the body, thoughts speak in words.
we cannot live without emotions, body, thought and probably not
without words forever.
in a love relationship with myself or with for me a woman,
to see me and to see her i need to take a distance to my feeling and emotions
in between.
it is not about control nor about negation, it is about the
transformation and opening of self, about giving way to life
and space.
we can love another one only when we are ready to love ourselves
and when we are open to be loved, to let love happen and flow freely.
this is all.
and somehow so often so very much difficult.
i walk through my days in good and in bad.
i persist as much as i can in my own way,
a way in which i try to find and give the heart
of life as pure as i can.
i am a western educated man with an identity
which is a different one as when i would have had my
childhood in Tibet.
for my consciousness i had to stand against concepts
foreign to the soul, follow rules which i wanted to break and broke,
question and analyze and deconstruct everything i heard, saw and read,
all what was "put" into me.
it formed and forms along the experience of life in this society, of my body,
my emotions, longing and frustration. it changed and changes
with continuous narration and invention of a self and even lies to myself,
it is nothing fixed nor is it transparent.
and it babbles a lot, often it is hard to see through the noise.
i learned to follow true feeling and see it as right,
and i see it also as right to relax and change perspective.
i cannot deny my needs forever and i can.
i cannot deny that i have a child in me
who wants to be loved, looks for protection, warmth
and welcome and embrace-and i can.
i cannot deny that i am a man in love and i can.
i can: for love or more so because of it.
so, these are two 'matters'.
one is to take a distance to self to see the other.
one is that without love all looks pale and meaningless.
__________________________________________________________
emotions speak through the body, thoughts speak in words.
we cannot live without emotions, body, thought and probably not
without words forever.
in a love relationship with myself or with for me a woman,
to see me and to see her i need to take a distance to my feeling and emotions
in between.
it is not about control nor about negation, it is about the
transformation and opening of self, about giving way to life
and space.
we can love another one only when we are ready to love ourselves
and when we are open to be loved, to let love happen and flow freely.
this is all.
and somehow so often so very much difficult.
i walk through my days in good and in bad.
i persist as much as i can in my own way,
a way in which i try to find and give the heart
of life as pure as i can.
i am a western educated man with an identity
which is a different one as when i would have had my
childhood in Tibet.
for my consciousness i had to stand against concepts
foreign to the soul, follow rules which i wanted to break and broke,
question and analyze and deconstruct everything i heard, saw and read,
all what was "put" into me.
it formed and forms along the experience of life in this society, of my body,
my emotions, longing and frustration. it changed and changes
with continuous narration and invention of a self and even lies to myself,
it is nothing fixed nor is it transparent.
and it babbles a lot, often it is hard to see through the noise.
i learned to follow true feeling and see it as right,
and i see it also as right to relax and change perspective.
i cannot deny my needs forever and i can.
i cannot deny that i have a child in me
who wants to be loved, looks for protection, warmth
and welcome and embrace-and i can.
i cannot deny that i am a man in love and i can.
i can: for love or more so because of it.
so, these are two 'matters'.
one is to take a distance to self to see the other.
one is that without love all looks pale and meaningless.
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