Sonntag, 20. Juli 2014

pasta alla Asia for people in a hurry

yesterday i did this:

1)spaghetti, boil in really well salted water, not al dente, but fairly soft
   drain water off, mix with a good lump of butter in still warm pot.
   stir with black pepper powder.

2) prepare before: large nice ceramic bowl, use a mix of soysauce, brown sugar, black pepper powder,            mixed italian herbs, lemon  juice, a splash of Worcester, a tiny bit of Madeira,
   add excellent green olive oil and a good lot of finely chopped chives.
    (if you don't have these use spring onions)

3) fry finely cut onions golden brown, adding a bit of brown sugar, pepper, oregano.
    (for non vegetarians: you can add bacon sliced in small bits or minced meat.)

4) Stir and mix all parts together. Eat.



unfinished,stage 2; "the destruction of dreams"



i don't know what to say, but i said it. about that. now. something nags and gnaws at the back of my mind.
and i don't know what to do about it. nothing. paint. i think if you pay attention to bitching too much, it will take you in and over. i know the place. been there. i opt for the phoenix method. leave it be. if you must: burn, all, rise out of ashes.

Freitag, 18. Juli 2014

Joan Baez Peter Schickele Baptism medley 1968

another black day.

all what i do here is irrelevant. it is creating a world around me into which i can retire and where i can recreate.i could just as well go for a walk and talk to the neighbours or to the lady taking my money in the supermarket. what happens happens, and i cannot deny my awareness. today wish i could re-create but i can only be here and listen and wonder .a bad day for all of us. troops marching here and a civilian plane brought down there. all of this and more: so much wasted life. such an insult to reason. such a torture for the heart. where is this "love" we are all talking about? what is stronger, the fire of destruction or the passion of birth and creation, the clouds of hate and greed or the sword of reason? what is stronger, in the long run, the pen or the guns? i spent an evening with friends. but in spite of tiredness, i am sad now. are we humans human, is all this what we call human? then....i really don't know just now. if 'they' are stupid, then 'i' am. and somehow: i don't want to be like this. but i know: my thoughts and words are nothing, just thoughts and words

Donnerstag, 17. Juli 2014

i am free

i am free

i am the river
i flow
and
i am here

i am the forest,
i whisper,
the wind tickles
my tongue,
words

listen
the jay bird calls
and
the hunter
holds his step




diary, July 15th

your doctor's quote for today: in spite of all the lies i have to hear, truly amidst confusion, suffering and chaos, i have survived as a human and as a spiritual being. i still am near, not only with empathy but with compassion. i am alive. i have failed my children and women more often when they needed me. i have mistreated myself. this is where my borders are these last few years. so please, dear patients, don't try to hurl me out of me into your universe. i will not follow. i will only walk next to you, and i will not carry you.

Mittwoch, 16. Juli 2014

Antonio Tabucchi...

i read Antonio Tabucchi, Requiem.Uma alucinação. in German. in one go. i am fascinated, enchanted. hallucinative reality, trancelike, absolutely clear and wonderful and exciting with extraordinary awareness and observation. and something i could call love. the only books i can just now remember from recent reading which took me into just only a similar kind of dreamlike experience are Peter Sloterdijk, Der Zauberbaum and and Steve Stern, The frozen Rabbi and Georgia Bing, Molly Moon's incredible book of hypnotism. i love Tabucchi. publicly.

Mandelzoom 8211







E=mc²  ,1905: not enough but

Sonntag, 13. Juli 2014

Perlman play's Rachmaninoff 's vocalise

Philip Glass: Metamorphosis (full album: 2006), piano Branka Parlic

asparagus soup

you need a load of asparagus, at least 1 kg. peel it. boil the peelings in half  selfmade chicken broth (altern.: use veg. soup stock cubes in water) and in (at least) half good white wine.  add a lot of fresh nutmeg, 2-3 slices of a lemon, cane sugar about 2-3 spoons, black pepper, a pinch of salt. boil for 15 minutes. not longer. (will get bitter!)
remove the peelings and the lemon slices, press the juice out through a sieve.
now add more nutmeg and more nutmeg, add salt to taste, a bit more good wine.
use some starch flower, stir with cold water and fresh nutmeg, add to the soup, add a real good chunk of butter, boil and stir again for a moment.
wait for a bit, now the soup should not boil anymore.
then whisk 2-3 egg yolks in.
that's about it.
good appetite.




Samstag, 12. Juli 2014

Sag Aloo (modified, spinach-potato-ginger curry)

Sag Aloo
modified!



·         1 chopped onion, in sesame oil (or ghee if you have it), fry golden brown i a heavy saucepan or wok.
.    add  coriander seeds and cummin seeds each 1/2 teaspoon, cook 1 minute. 
     liquidise another onion in the mixer with 1/2 teaspoon each of chillipowder and coriander powder. add to the saucepan and cook 5 minutes. 

     in the meantime chop about 1 kg fresh spinach or 500 grm frozen spinach in smaller pieces, add to an extra pot with boiling water for 2-3 minutes only for fresh spinach, 5-8 minutes for frozen one. then remove the spinach out o the water and keep it separate.

     at the same time boil 500 grm potatoes, peeled, in about 1cm cubes in salted water, about 10-12 minutes.

     now add spinach and potatoes to the onion-spice-mix, add  1-2 green chillies, finely chopped, 2 teaspoons fenugreek, a 1/2 cinnamom stick, a few cardamom seeds. cook for about another 8-10 minutes.

     for the end, peel a good piece of ginger, at least 50 grm, chop in very fine slices, add this to the pot with about 1/2 can of tomatoes (about 100 grm), just leave it on the still hot oven, simmer only for 10 minutes. 
     
     stir in a bit of ginger powder and a hint of Madras curry powder.

     I like to add a bit of cane sugar, soy sauce and lime or lemon juice to taste.

     the potatoes should be well done of course, but i want my spinach still green.


lamb in the crockpot

lamb in the crockpot ( a clay casserole )

Cut lamb shoulder in cubes, marinate overnight with lemon juice, a lot of fresh thyme, pepper, salt, cane sugar and topped up with good olive oil.
Keep clay casserole in water for 30 mins.
Put all food in casserole, add a few tomatoes in quarters,a few potatoes in slices, an onion or two, a clove of garlic or two, add a few spring onions finely chopped , 10 allspice corns, 6-8 bay leaves, 10-12 corns black pepper, one medium size red chili, a good bit of ginger thinly sliced, a large stick of cinnamom, a table spoon of Ras el Hanout if available(otherwise a bit of cummin powder), a shot of portuguese hot piri piri sauce, a few spoons of Madeira, more cane sugar and lemon juice: put it in the oven, 45 mins at 200 degrees Celsius, then simmer at about 160 degrees for another 1.45 hours. 
You cannot go wrong.

If this is too hot and spicy for you: forget about it, all.
Eat somewhere else.
If you are vegeterian: don't do it.

Pink Floyd - Fearless

to the reader

this blog is private but public.
if you know me, just don't worry about the last weeks.
if you don't know me the better.
i am an authentic man, passionate, at least a little bit crazy.
i write for myself, i write to put the struggle on the wall,
the journey, the confusion, the passage of time,
the fight and the survival.
i need this.
it is not an analytic process, it is the flow of a life
banned in moments,  a ritual.
i am out of it, i sleep again.
the pores of my skin closed.
i breathe just like everybody does.
the bleeding stopped. no more dressings.
i eat, i drink.

good night.



Freitag, 11. Juli 2014

David Gilmour in Royal Albert Hall - Coming Back to Life

All I Really Want to Do - Bob Dylan (5/7/65) Bootleg





isn't he a fcn liar...:-), but

patience is not a virtue per se, listening is, here: R. Tagore

Time is endless in thy hands, my lord. 


There is none to count thy minutes. 

Days and nights pass and ages bloom and fade like flowers. 
Thou knowest how to wait. 

Thy centuries follow each other perfecting a small wild flower. 

We have no time to lose, 
and having no time we must scramble for a chance. 
We are too poor to be late. 

And thus it is that time goes by 
while I give it to every querulous man who claims it, 
and thine altar is empty of all offerings to the last. 

At the end of the day I hasten in fear lest thy gate be shut; 
but I find that yet there is time. 

my office


this the place where i see
patients

if they try too hard to fuck up my mind,
i fuck theirs
and show them eternity
in a pill