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Wednesday, August 5, 2015

Live and invent, Samuel Beckett

so~ another one stuck in words and at the same time walking out,
and in a way of losing identity together with ideology
but to find himself~

Live and invent.
I have tried.
I must have tried.
Invent.
It is not the word. 
Neither is to live.
No matter.
I have tried. […]
I say living without knowing what it is.
I tried to live without knowing what I was trying.
Perhaps I have lived afterall,
without knowing.
SAMUEL BECKETT

M. Rostroprovich & H. Tachezi - Louis De Caix D'hervelois

on the ideology of suffering: first thoughts

there are several important aspects to the ideology of suffering.

but i start with asking: would any animal suffer on purpose and out of free will?
no.

the ideology of suffering, the historical growth and overgrowth  of meaning has quite demonical ingredients, a mix of religion, internalized slavery and abuse, esoteric hybris and
masochism in its rawest meaning.

i continue with the next question: why do we have to suffer.
i can easily see that this question is futile, and the answer is up to my personal
experience and interpretation of life.

next question: do we all suffer?
answer: yes.


religion tells us suffering and the way of crucifixion  is necessary
to 'purify' us and to grow into 'better' humans,
"better" being defined by whomsoever,
most times by those who make us suffer and abuse our very lifes  in addition to 'natural' suffering grounded in our very existence as perishable beings.
some of us even learn to find sensual pleasure in suffering, being beaten or beating themselves.
warlords make us see suffering as heroism,
our social "superiors" as part of the job,
priests as the ultimate way of Christ.

well maybe Christ overdid it for them, he is reported to have said, more or less, go in peace and love each other, you are redeemed...it took away quite a bit of threat and power...?

As we all have to suffer anyway it is easy to fall in the trap
prepared for us by the "other",
i guess it can be comforting to find a sense in suffering
when you go through it anyway and to see yourself for example
as an idolized being, a Nietzsche superhuman.
Nietzsche said, after all, what doesn't kill us makes us stronger:
and it sounds like an aim to reach. i cannot see it in this way.
no, simply i am here, alive, to enjoy life on this earth as much as i can,
from there all basic "religious" stuff follows quite easily, naturally,
not to hurt other beings, to love and to care
instead of violating oneself and others.
love your self and you will live just as good as is possible.


At the same time all religions mix our clear thinking with ideas of how to avoid or find an end of suffering. this is of course quite seductive.

forget all your desire, put your longing in a deep lake,
clap your hand and turn into pure being,
meditate and train to forget yourself.
very nice idea. very.
sounds good, as a final goal
it cannot make any sense to a loving and caring human being ,
whatever loving and caring may mean.

don't ejaculate and you will find the energy used up for the production and ejaculation of sperm in your pineal gland as inner light and strength.
this is attributed to Ghandi. quite abstruse to me.
i don't want sperm in my head, not because it may not be nice,
it is what it is, but because it does not belong there.

well, as long as one is present and aware and uses one's very own intelligence,
a lot of suffering can be avoided:
it just means to deal with unpleasant stuff disturbing the flow of our days and nights
quite consciously at the right time, most times immediately, not always.
the tactics of putting one's head into the sand and wait for the best is certainly the worst.

suffering as a quality of life cannot be avoided, physical decay and death cannot be overcome.
but what i want to say: it is not the only way to wisdom.
Nobody should be led on to believe this.

Joy, laughing and kindness are the other side and should never be neglected
just so we can feel our bad tooth with our tongue
and stick to pain and being unhappy.
It doesn't make us better, more important, no, nothing, maybe just more lonely.
This...does not make any sense.


we must learn through our own intelligence to see and FEEL all experience here de-nuded from ideology and turn our way of seeing opposites into an inner view of polarity.

on this way we will certainly not turn stupid, and we can still ask the child's question:
why do i suffer, why do you suffer, why, why, why.
and most certainly, the presence of suffering will show as a way
the same as the presence of night,
it may not explain anything to us at all,
but when we can listen as free from ideology as we can be,
we may feel the flow of life and death, of joy and pain, of sleep and waking,
of memory and of the mercy of forgetting,
and we may participate in the working of our universe.
even this: not an aim, but a possibility of experience.
one i like to ....have as a personal perspective.













Ostad Jalal Zoufonoun - Improvisation in Afshari

Hector Zazou / Surrender

Falling Slowly - Glen Hansard and Marketa Irglova from the movie "Once" ...

the daily news: back

ref.: Kepler 452b ,Kepler-186f


back from a nomadic experience in outer space.
yes, there is extraterrestrial life.
i cannot re-member where.
but it was very different.
yes, i couldn't re-cognize it.
just tasted its essence.
Let SETI go on....