Dear Mr. Krishnamurti
I agree with your abhorrence of all mainstream and commercialized meditation,
with your absolute negation of meditation for a purpose. I agree with nearly everything.
But for me to put my life in order , for me it means to allow myself space for disorder, chaos and desire, happiness and sadness, for creativity and dreams, for sharing and for the trouble of relating to another human in love. I am a living human being, and though I can be just as acidly poisonous as you at times, my will is to accept me as myself each moment of my life,
in good and in bad, I accept that i am somebody who does not only love but "wants". my aim is not to educate myself to be another man, but to go and fight for more light and kindness as much as I can. i am ready in meditation and in my death to let go of all patterns and desires and dreams. I try constantly to be aware of who i am and what i do and what life and death means to me.
I am quite opposed to the principles of order and education as a way to grow. order is a mere tool of intelligence on how to find more space and time to breathe and to enjoy the present moment. education will not make me wiser. life will make me wiser as long as i can stay conscious and aware.
the risk to live is here, right here. i am still alive..
but with all wise words and insights, you could be happiest only through distance and the isolation of your needs, though not of your ego which was on stage so very often. and i will fail as soon as my desire meets me in life. I have to accept.
Good night, Mr.Krishnamurti
PS: One road to freedom goes through awareness to acceptance.
PPS: In my imagination we are the ship and the ocean. We may learn to set sails and to use the rudder, but we cannot dominate the ocean. We are travellers....fireflies...
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